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Goldilocks & Her Side of the Story |
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Everybody thinks they know the story of “Goldilocks and the Three Bears”, but they don’t! All that is phony baloney. Hi, my name is Goldilocks. Now don’t be alarmed, I’m not going to eat your porridge, or break your chair, or sleep in your bed; no matter how soft it is. I am going to tell you the truth, and nothing but the truth. I didn’t do any of those things to the Three Bears. You know The Big Bad Wolf, like in the stories “The Three Little Pigs” and “Little Red Riding Hood”. Well, he is the one who ate the porridge and broke Baby Bear’s chair. I will now tell you the true story of The Three Bears. One cold and windy Saturday evening in February, I was out selling my Girl Scout Cookies. When I came to my last house, I sold four boxes, boy was I lucky! It was time to start heading for home, so I decided to take a shortcut through the woods when I heard a deafening howl. I was smack-dab in the middle of the creepy woods when a wolf started to chase me. I stumbled upon a house and ran to it. The door wasn’t locked so I went inside. The smell of the creamy porridge made me hungry, but I knew it would be wrong to eat it. I went back outside and saw the wolf in front of me so I ran back inside. Before I could lock the door, the wolf fiercely sprang inside. I ran around the table but the wolf jumped up on the table and started eating all the porridge in Baby Bear’s bowl. |
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I wanted to defend myself from the porridge eating canine, so I grabbed the first thing I found. I tried to pick up Papa Bear’s chair, but it was humungous. Then I tried the medium-sized chair, but it was so soft that the cushions fell on my head. I was able to pick up the small chair, so I held it in front of me like a lion tamer in the lion’s den. The wolf pounced at me and broke the chair! He staggered backward and stepped on my remaining boxes of Girl Scout cookies. The cookies went everywhere! This made the wolf hungry, so he stopped to nibble on the cookies. I had my chance to escape. I ran up the stairs. Now I know what you are thinking, why did I go upstairs to get away from a wolf? I figured the wolf’s pack would be gathering soon outside of the cottage. I could not defend myself against a pack of wolves, so I did the next best thing. I scurried upstairs. I ran in the first room I saw. It was the bedroom so I hid under one of the beds. The wolf ate all of the cookies and came looking for me. I guess he smelled the cookie that I had hidden in my pocket, because he came right into the bedroom. The wolf jumped on the Dad’s bed, but I wasn’t there. Then the wolf jumped on the Mom’s bed, but I still wasn’t there. The wolf didn’t jump on the baby’s bed because it was smelly. Good thing, because that was the bed I was hiding under. Now why was I hiding under a smelly bed? I was thinking that since wolves have such a great sense of smell he would not want to go anyway near the awful stench. And I was right. The wolf quit searching for me when he heard the howl of his pack (it is a good thing I didn’t go out the front door.) He decided to go home. After hearing the door close, I climbed out from under the bed. I was so exhausted from my encounter with the wolf that I laid on the bed for a second. Next thing I knew I was fast asleep. |
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While I lay sleeping in Baby Bear’s bed I had a terrifying dream about a wolf eating extra hot chicken wings. Meanwhile, the Three Bears walked into their home growling with hunger, and saw the terrifying mess. Mama Bear yelled, “Oh my beautiful house, what are we going to do?” Mama Bear walked over to the porridge stained table and said, “Just look at this mess, and someone’s been eating my porridge!” The Papa Bear growled, “Someone has been eating my porridge too!” And Baby Bear whimpered, “Somebody devoured my creamy Uncle Bens Porridge!” Papa Bear said, “Whoever did this is going to pay the price for all this damage.” Suddenly, Baby Bear began to sob, “Whoever came in broke my chair, it was my favorite chair.” Papa Bear walked over to the chairs and said, “Sure enough, someone’s been in my chair.” “Someone’s been in my chair too”, said Mama Bear. Then Baby Bear saw the trail of chocolate cookie crumbs going up the stairs and began eating them because he was hungry and his porridge was gone. Mama Bear and Papa Bear followed the chocolate cookie crumb trail up the stairs straight to the bedroom. The creak of the bedroom door jolted me awake. Pure terror was staring at me. I tried to scream, but nothing came out. “Who are you and why are you here”, Papa Bear asked in a deep voice. I couldn’t move. “My name is G-Goldilocks”, I said trembling with fear. “What have you done to my family’s house?” asked Papa Bear in a deep voice. “It wasn’t me, it was the big bad wol…” a chilling howl from outside broke into my explanation. “Where’s my food”, cried Baby Bear. “The wolf ate it” I cried. “I think I will just leave now” “Not so fast little girl” growled Papa Bear. “Listen to my story, I can explain everything”, I said. And to my surprise, they actually listened to my story. “Why should I trust you?” asked Papa Bear. Mama Bear asked, “Papa, do you think a little Girl Scout could do all this harm?” Just then we heard the deafening howl of the wolf and his pack. They were outside, just waiting for me to run away from the house. Then I noticed that Mama Bear was not in the room. A minute later she came back in carrying five chicken breasts. “What are we going to do with chicken breasts?” I asked. “We will throw them out the back window to distract the wolves while Papa Bear lowers you out the front window”, explained Mama Bear. This made me remember my dream. Things were really getting strange, but I knew this was my only chance to get away. Mama Bear threw the chicken out the back window while Papa Bear lowered me down from the front window. I could hear the wolves gobbling the chicken breasts. As soon as my feet touched the ground, I ran out of those woods and went straight home, and I never went back to the forest again. Now you have heard my side of the story, the true story. Please believe me, it was all the Wolf’s fault. |
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